Making New Friends

I realized this weekend while out to dinner with the boy and his friends how much I enjoy meeting new people. This is something that ten years ago I would never have said. I was incredibly shy and quiet all through high school. I was not the type of person who would agree to go on blind dates, or introduce myself to someone I didn't know, strike up a conversation with someone in line at the grocery store. I hated speaking in class and any/all attention drawn towards me. I had a tight group of friends and that was about it. I didn't feel the need to seek out or make new friends at any point in high school. In a lot of ways, a lot of that is true. I still have a core group of friends - whether it's my college pals, ranch friends, grad school friends - that I rely on. So much about me has changed in the last decade though.

I was trying to figure out when this change occurred. If you ask my college pals they'll tell you it was after I went skydiving in Switzerland at age 18. They swear I came back from that and was a much more effervescent and outgoing person. But when I look back I really don't think I was that different a person in college than I was in high school. I was still, in many ways, still very insecure and quiet. I still hated speaking up in class and dreaded the thought of going to a party where I knew no one.

I think my two years at the Ranch were really important and helped me gain a new sense of independence. I started to realize I could do things I never thought I could. Whether it was learning to drive a stick shift the hard way, operating a chain saw or fixing a 1/4 mile stretch of fence all by myself. I also met an insane amount of new people. I had to get along with coworkers who were very different from me. I had to take teenagers and adults out on rides and, not only teach them how to ride and make sure they arrived back at the Ranch safely, but I had to talk and entertain them for 2 1/2 hours. I look back and see a very marked change in myself after my time at the Ranch. I was more social and outgoing, but most of all, I was much more confident.

I think my first boyfriend (and consequent first heartbreak) after college was a really important experience. It sounds odd that getting your heart broken could build confidence, but I really think it did. I realized a lot about myself that has played such an important part in my relationship now. Getting dumped sucked, but it is beyond true that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Now I'm living on my own and the girl who hated speaking in class does just that all day long. I've been on blind dates and done things 10 years ago Abigail would have never done. I coach track and go to dinner parties and get-togethers where I don't know anyone. And I love meeting new people! I've made good friends with the wife of one of JC's classmates in the last couple weeks. She and her husband hosted a dinner party a few weeks ago. I gave her my number 'cos I figured we were both home alone all day while our men were in school. We met up for lunch one day and had such a blast we've become great pals. I think it surprised the boy a bit last night when we met up with her and her friends and husband. Honestly, I surprise myself at how easily and how much I enjoy making new friends. I used to hate leaving places all the time 'cos I hated leaving friends behind. In fact, my friends and family can testify that when I left the Ranch to go to grad school I said something along the lines of 'I don't want to make any friends, I just want to get my degree and move on'. That's laughable now when I think about the awesome friends I made at school and how much I enjoy making new ones. It's comforting to know that wherever I go and whatever happens, I have a network of friends all around the country who have my back and I can always make new ones!

Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend!